AM I the only one that feels like this is all just for TV... I mean of course their going to raise.... show and pony come on already. I'm over it. As if we don't have enough to worry about, jobs, security, peace of mind for our futures and our kids future!
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Venting 101 ~ THE BITTER B%@$!
Seriously if you are so obsess with hoping your significant
other is a cheating scumbag like yourself you are pathetic…
If you so high of your own supply and messed around and loss
the best you ever had I feel sorry for ya, but you should have been smarter and
quit that shit…
If you looked at all this,
I have to offer and have offered to your sorry ass, and still been
dipping in someone else’s yard, you can jump, hop, and a skip to the other side
of the grass honey… cause you just saved me from a lifetime of heart ache…
Bitter bitch… YES I AM – who’s asking , years out of my
life, bared his child, faithful, supportive, devoted to your cheating, negative
breathing, minimal effort ass… ahhh yea I’m bitter so what…
I will be that, and move it to the left and move on, but
before I go I will continue to tell you, you’re tacky, sad, and stupid...
And though I may have been the one who hoped you’d change for
us, for her, for our family… I’m glad you failed, disappointed, and shamed me
with your behavior….
Is Fantasia Pregnant???
Well it seems so, Here's a picture of her performing at Baltimore's Art Scape Festival this year.
Beyonce Complex Magazine 2011 Aug/Sept Cover
D'angelo is Coming Back
After his 11 year hiatus, D'Angelo is making a comeback... sources say he was spotted in the studio recently with Questlove of Roots in NYC working on his Album... After enduring a car accident, followed by an arrest for drug possession he is finally coming back for some of your brown sugar...
Sally Hansen Salon Effects
Sally Hansen Salon Effect is so hot, it is the new must have for your nails. I love it, its like instant fab for your nails, and it last for a while. Try it you'll be glad you did.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Changes
Sometimes we hold on to things, because we desire for it so
much, when we should have let go a long time ago. You do not hold the key to
change another person’s perception of you. All the good you do, all you give,
and all you say can never truly change how they see you, treat you, or use you.
You will find yourself changing yourself, hiding when you’ve done nothing
wrong, scrambling to be what you think is perfect in their minds when, the
truth is you have no power in the situation. You cannot change others’ minds
unless they want their minds to be changed.
Some people chooses other people because they believe they
are more alike than others, same characteristics, same ways, whatever. What happens when one chooses to change, now
the dynamics of the relationship changes. You are no longer the same in ways,
which that person embodied you to be. Now the changer wants the unchanged
changed!
For instance, you’re a cheater and the other person you get
with is a cheater. Over time, you both promise to stop cheating. You stopped,
but your partner couldn’t. Now you are ridiculing your significant other
because they’re still cheating… or even better you’re both crack heads and you
both decided to kick the habit. You did it, but your partner keeps relapsing…
now you are calling them a crack head and pointing a finger… who’s wrong?
It is so much easier to see the faults in others and point
the finger, because you know you’ve done no wrong, but what if your wrong is
not admitting it was time to go when you realized that the changes you promised
to changed was changed and the other person’s was not. What if you are wrong
waiting for that person to change, but in the process you spotlight them and
their issues to the point they are constantly under surveillance? What if it has gotten so out of hand, the
other person is no longer focused on their change, but is now convinced that
you must be hiding something to be so determined and your point is lost in the
mist of it all?
We can all be bitter for the turn out in a nasty or
undesired break up, but what was your role… it’s not always what you have done
wrong… sometimes it’s what you haven’t done.
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Commitment
To be or not to be is the question. This week my focus has been on commitment and
what is its place in a relationship. When you meet someone you think you are in
love with, or you think is the one you make a commitment to them…. Well lets
back track… let us take this from the prospective of today’s society. When two
people get together whether out of lust, love, or a facade they tend to say
lets date, let’s go out, let’s be in a relationship…i.e. let’s commit to each
other, but making a commitment can be a dangerous and serious matter depending
the context of that commitment.
Commitments can change lives, make and break futures, hearts, and trust.
So let’s talk a little about the word commitment in terms of
a relationship. Commitment binds you like a contract of the heart, mind, and
soul. You vow never to hurt the other person physically, mental, and so on. You
in essence marry that person without the ring, the vowels, and the church. But many of us take this word and its meaning
so lightly.
Some may ask, how can you be committed if you are not sure
about the other person… and the truth is commitment is a personal choice, a vow,
you may say that you make to yourself about your relationship. You can never
base commitment on the other persons:
behavior, actions, or words. Let me explain that more… Without you knowing what the other person is
doing and thinking you have to make it up in your mind that you are going to be
faithful, helpful, and kind to that person. You live your life committed to
that person, and honor your commitment. Now that doesn’t mean that the other
person has to live by the same code, and that’s the danger about commitment.
When someone is hurt because they found out that you are cheating
on them, that doesn’t mean that they aren’t cheating on you! That only means
that finding out that the person you love is with someone else hurts. With that said you cannot judge if someone is
being committed to you by their words, or their reaction to a hurtful
situation, but by their actions over time consistently.
Just because they are not being committed doesn’t always
mean that they don’t love you it just means that, they are not ready for that
step in life within their selves.
The definition of commitment by dictionary terms is 1) the
act of committing, 2) the state of being committed, 3) the act of committing,
pledging, or engaging oneself.
And when you say you are committed you must first understand
the meaning of commit by dictionary terms: 1) to give in trust or charge;
consign, 2) to pledge (oneself) to a position on an issue or question; express
one’s intention, feelings, etc.
So to wrap this up a commitment is something
made to one’s self. You base it on if you are ready it’s a step a milestone in
life one that when used in a relationship should be taken seriously. Hence why
when you are just “dating”, you should explain to the other person the level of
commitment you are able to give. When you are “engaged”, explain what has
changed in your commitment (promise). And finally when you are “married”, you
must be ready and explain your complete commitmen
Privileges...without the ring
Many women and men when we enter into a relationship we feel
compel to give our all. Your trust, love, faithfulness, body, heart, and soul…
but slow down.
Privilege 1) Getting to know you
A new relationship should be spent learning each other
defining, if you truly like each other, in other words getting to know the
person beyond the bed, the smile, the laugh, their outer appearance. As your
relationship progresses so should your privileges. And just because you acted
out in the midst of passion doesn’t mean you have to continue it. Allow each
other the space to make decision on is this the one. Go on dates, seek out each
other’s interest then pursue them together. Learn each other’s “first ways”.
*Never rush to live together, share bank accounts together, and
start a family together before knowing if this is what you want to do forever.
Privilege 2) Lets take it slow
When you are (sure), you can take the steps towards sharing
these live changing things. You can start a separate bank account together, but
keep your own separate accounts. Ladies allow the man to make the next step solely
on his own, let him engage, don’t force the issue, and let it happen. Men allow
the woman to commit to you, don’t scare her, con her, and mislead her. If you
have been waiting too long i.e. 4-6 years for an engagement, for that
commitment, then you should have that conversation on what is blocking the next
step in your lives together.
*When you take it slow you make the better decisions in life,
and the fear of losing that person should never be a question, if you are both
feeding your relationship.
Privilege 3) Your house or mine
Living together should be after you are both serious about
taking the next step ~ marriage~. I recommended that after an engagement two
people should live together to see the “true ways” of the other person, because
their “first ways” that has been shown to you in the beginning and through your
relationship thus far are far more different sometimes than their “true ways”.
*Also, know that having a child together does not mean you
are locked in, unfortunately, there is always the possibility that it may not
work, so basing your decision on whether you are stay in a relationship because
of a child is in almost every case a bad decision.
Privilege 4) Lets get it on
Getting married the ultimate decision… women we live for it,
men we close our eyes and step into it. Know that this is a decision you want
to make once. So, choosing wisely, and taking it seriously is very important to
the maintenance and survival of your marriage.
*Important notes
- Sex is determined by you and only you…
- Just because you may have started your relationship wrong, does mean you have to continue living it wrong
- Your life is what you make it
- If you are the only keeping the commitments asked of your relationship then you should exit stage right and leave that relationship
- Communication, finance, and trust are the true measure of if a relationship is going to last, because as you progress in your relationships you will get comfortable, relax and your love for the other person matures overtime through different stages
- You have to be honest to yourself and not selfish to your partner, if you’re not ready it far better to say it now than forever hold it and live them in the dark and alone
- Appreciate the one you are with if you truly want to be their
- Remember tomorrow is never promised to no man or woman
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